Like the spider web, all of life is connected and intertwined.



Bird Droppings October 3, 2025
Like the spider web, all of life is connected and intertwined.

As I thought about the Sydney J. Harris passage below, I recall a walk one morning out to a quiet spot where I would meditate, and something hit me as I faced east towards the rising sun, the gossamer threads of life interconnected with everything. They were iridescent and softly moving with the wind. Occasionally, one thread would disconnect and float effortlessly upwards, sparkling and dancing as it went ever so slowly. Each twig, each plant, and each leaf seemed to be connected. Each rock and branch is a tiny thread weaving through the entire visage before me.

Most people would read this and scoff, yet in the early morning, as the sun rises and begins to move across the sky, spiders have been at work all night, moving between plants and rocks, trees and leaves, leaving threads of silk. If you were standing in the midst of them, they would be invisible, yet with the sun behind, sparkling in the light, a beautiful scene. Occasionally, one thread disconnects and floats off, sparkling along the way. As I sat pondering, as if an old man sitting looking towards the east in the early morning many years ago, and coming in to tell his grandchildren, as I started the passage. On the back of my T-shirt, it reads All things are connected and rightly so by a thin gossamer strand of silk.

“Our task is to make our children into disciples of the good life, by our own actions toward them and toward other people. This is the only effective discipline in the long run. But it is more arduous and takes longer than simply “laying down the law.” Before a child (or a nation) can accept the law, it has to learn why the law has been created for its own welfare.” Sydney J. Harris

Today I am faced with dealing with quite a bit of schoolwork; it seems I must keep on learning. Five years ago, I was suffering from a ruptured Achilles tendon. I made it upstairs, but I moved my computer downstairs since it was hard to climb stairs in a cast. Today I moved my computer back upstairs after my cancer surgery. It was hard for me to go back and forth on the stairs for some reason; maybe my balance was off due to the pressure bandage on my face pressing on my eye.

There is a house to clean, a goodwill run, groceries, paper to write, a midterm to take, and so much more. Often in teaching special education, we use the term manifestation. Is it a manifestation of their disability, or are they choosing to do whatever it is they are doing that got them in trouble? I find myself needing a manifestation. Am I lazy, or is my back really keeping me from getting my yard work done?

“What it lies in our power to do, it lies in our power not to do.” Aristotle

“Self-command is the main discipline.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

Many years ago, I spent six months involved in counseling on a psychiatric unit in a state mental facility. There was never a question about why something happened, being that they were considered combative psychotic adolescents, which was the term used to describe the unit. When someone got upset, it was solitary confinement and rather large doses of drugs, and a few strait jackets were employed. Little was occurring to change the behavior and or rationalize those behaviors and or find why that behavior even had occurred, simply deal with the moment. I find it interesting how many teachers still react that way. Medicate, isolate, prostrate, eradicate, and adjudicate students for behavior. Wow, an acronym of sorts, MIPEA.

“Anybody who gets away with something will come back to get away with a little bit more.” Harold Schoenberg

“Better to be pruned to grow than cut up to burn.” John Trapp

Often, as I find a quote, the person behind those words has more to offer, as is the case with Schoenberg, who is a scholar of music. He is also a very prolific writer about great musicians and their music. John Trapp was a bible scholar with several biblical commentaries to his credit. Both men were writers who were very self-disciplined.

“THE STUDY OF WORDS is useless unless it leads to the study of the ideas that the words stand for. When I am concerned about the proper use of words, it is not because of snobbism or superiority, but because their improper use leads to poor ways of thinking. Take the word ‘discipline’ that we hear so much about nowadays in connection with the rearing of children. If you know something about word derivations, you know that ‘discipline’ and ‘disciple’ come from the same Latin root discipulus, which means ‘to learn, to follow.’” Sydney J. Harris, Strictly Speaking

Sitting here looking up references and quotes related to discipline and ending up with the example; to learn and to follow this is semantics as we go. To operate a public school, we must have standards to operate by, so we have rules. Looking at this from a behaviorist standpoint, it is easy to say ABC: Antecedent, Behavior, and Consequence. First, you have an antecedent that stimulus is what causes the behavior. Then you have the behavior, which is the event or action that we see, feel, or hear about. Finally, we have a consequence which can be what we do in response or what the students or person issuing the behavior receives for eliciting that behavior.

“What is the appropriate behavior for a man or a woman in the midst of this world, where each person is clinging to his piece of debris? What’s the proper salutation between people as they pass each other in this flood?” Leonard Cohen

“Act the way you’d like to be and soon you’ll be the way you act.” George W. Crane


“To know what people really think, pay regard to what they do, rather than what they say.” Rene Descartes

It is always about what we do. Over the past few days, I have been discussing with several teachers and friends been discussing perception that is how we see events and happenings. One of the categories in writing a behavioral plan for a student is planned ignoring, which is often simply tuning out a behavior. Often, with no stimulus to keep it going, behavior will disappear. So often, it is getting attention that is the desired consequence.

“People don’t change their behavior unless it makes a difference for them to do so.” Fran Tarkenton

“Physics does not change the nature of the world it studies, and no science of behavior can change the essential nature of man, even though both sciences yield technologies with a vast power to manipulate the subject matters.” B. F. Skinner

These lines from a football hall of fame quarterback and the father of behaviorism are intriguing, as these two men from distinctly different arenas have come to very similar conclusions in their thoughts. Tarkenton has built an internationally known management consulting firm based on his thoughts. It has to make a difference to the person for them to change. Skinner sees that we can manipulate the subject matters, and we can offer alternative consequences to hopefully change the behaviors to ones we can accept. A Sydney J. Harris line caught my attention this morning as I started on discipline, as I prepare for several IEPs later this week, some related to behavior.

“…by our own actions toward them and toward other people.” Sydney J. Harris

So often, it is not the consequences that deter or change a behavior but our actions towards the person and those around them. It is the example we set and not what we say that matters. Please today, as we venture out, keep all in harm’s way on your mind and in your heart, and always give thanks, namaste.

My family and friends, I do not say this lightly,
Mitakuye Oyasin
(We are all related)
Bird


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