How do we know we are grown up?


Bird Droppings July 23, 2014
How do we know we are grown up?

“The day the child realizes that all adults are imperfect he becomes an adolescent; the day he forgives them; he becomes an adult; the day he forgives himself; he becomes wise.” Alden Nowlan

Earlier this week a former student posted on my Facebook wall a simple line, “If you haven’t grown up by fifty you don’t have to.” As I read this quote from Nowlan and thinking in terms of wisdom not being confined to the age but to affect or to understand of one’s self I do after spending several days with my granddaughter, grandson and family I think we cycle wisdom. I do believe children are born wise and become through societal pressures unwise.

Looking back at the quote I started with these are amazing words as I only recently became aware of this writer, poet and essayist from Canada. I wish I had written or said these words. Over the years, I have noticed that students walking about high school for the first few days and being at that adolescent age they begin to see the flaws and imperfection but their perception is to enhance their world and creates ripples. They see the flaws and are upset and react in a negative fashion. Adults then reciprocate with reactions and behaviors elicit consequences.

For some of that point of forgiveness comes soon and for others may take many years after leaving home, and college and marriage and their own children till forgiveness hits and adulthood true adulthood is realized. In some cases but for that rare few, wisdom can come earlier, and they truly are wise from an early age. I find trust too follows a similar road as we move through life we realize that we cannot trust everyone, we tend forgive and forget and then we realize we should trust everyone.

My dear friends as we embark on a new journey every day try and trust and forgive two good vocabulary words for the day and seek peace and balance in your life. As I do every day, please keep all in harm’s way on your mind and your hearts and always give thanks namaste.

My family and friends I do not say this lightly,
Mitakuye Oyasin
(We are all related)
bird

2 thoughts on “How do we know we are grown up?

  1. Birdman, your musings are growing on me like mold…well, maybe not mold, more like a rich and velvety moss………..this post is why I always advise my brighter reflective types to do a Salinger upgrade from Catcher in the Rye to Franny and Zooey, which, seems to me, to go at the heart of your post, Nowlans quote and your prescriptive, “trust” and “forgive”. Those of us with the luxury of being able to ponder such musings are both fortunate beyond words but burdened as well………..ah……..Civilization and its Discontents, Indeed, soldier on!!!!!!!!!!

    • Made my day good sir this craziness started with a group of high school kids just throwing quotes out at them thoughts for the day on a yahoo group site fifteen years ago but became mediation of sorts for me to ponder my day. Trust is seldom considered in education but a driving force. Years ago wrote a much more serious paper on the development of trust and pointed to its opposite which is fear whole other story. Trust we can never have enough. again thank you sir

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