Bird Droppings July 2, 2026
Why is it so hard to listen to a child?

Sitting here by myself writing just after driving around searching for a sunrise and reminiscing, I recall listening to some children. It has been some time since I was sitting in my classroom in C-Hall when a friend came by with her baby brother, about six weeks old at the time. There is something about newborns that is so special; I use the term a sponge absorbing everything that happens around them. She left, and another group of folks came by, and with them was a small child, maybe five or six. Looking into my room, which at the time had quite a few critters, he saw my snakes moving and said he was afraid of snakes. Curiosity soon overcame him, and he went inside the door, as did his mother and sister. The little boy’s mother was drawn to a feather on my desk, and soon an hour-long discussion ensued.

The interesting part, and for me intriguing, was that every few minutes the little boy would ask a question. I answered many, but soon he interrupted my talk on Native Americans and feathers, and I tried to avoid his questions, as I do like to talk. Today, as I sit writing, listening to Carlos Nakai and watching the sun come up, listening to the sounds of the incoming morning, it hit me how often we turn our ears away from children when it is they we should be listening to. I am saddened that I did not take the time with that small child and listen more intently, rather than discuss it with the adults present. Perhaps it is old, but I have learned sometimes to listen rather than talk. It is a special listening of the heart and head when we talk with children.

“Head and heart listening requires that we attend to more than mere words. To understand the full meaning of what a child is saying to us, we have to “listen” to tone, inflection, feelings, and body language. By truly listening, we are saying to our children: ‘You are a person of worth. I love you, respect you, and want to understand you.’ Unfortunately, we are often so eager to get our own point across that we interrupt our children with our own ideas and don’t pay enough attention to their thoughts and feelings.” Stephen F. Duncan, Professor, School of Family Life, Brigham Young University

Who and where do we find answers? I think, often, from children. We tend to know what is right to do, to learn, to teach, and we do it, but as I listened to this child so many days ago, filled with questions I was too busy to answer, and sadly we do this every day. My mother called me yesterday, and we talked about my little nephew. He occasionally talks to pop-pop, my father, who passed away a little over seven years ago. He really never knew him, as he is only about eight years old. We so often put aside little children’s questions, thoughts, and dreams, leaving them with little more than our own.

“What does education often do? It makes a straight-cut ditch of a free, meandering brook.” Henry David Thoreau

Yesterday, as I finished my day, I sat and thought about various forms of curriculum and education, and as I was reading and jotting notes, this Thoreau passage came back. So often we want to make everyone like us. Embrace the questions; listen to the words, the thoughts, and emotions. Borrowing from a line I used yesterday, let us approach education One Child at a Time. We can learn so much from children. Please keep all in harm’s way on your mind and in your hearts and always give thanks. Namaste.

My family and friends, I do not say this lightly,
Mitakuye Oyasin
(We are all related)
docbird